'Ff'lo (fflo) wrote,

the big chorus week

Last week before the chorus shows.  Lots to do.  Some stressors and stuff that's not my job that I could go ahead and do but am trying hard not to.  The fun of anticipation is not some dessert one earns by finishing the canned green beans of responsibility; the fun of anticipation is a high priority in itself.  So there.  :)

At rehearsal last night, the first one with the band, with the air of big-hurry, gotta-be-business-like going on as if in a big spotlight itself, our eccentric older member (whose given name starts with E but doesn't like to go by that in the program so uses part of her middle name cuz she's protecting her identity) raised her hand after one song.  Did she have a question, asked the director?  No, she said, she had a comment.  It was that she once saw a cartoon that involved penguins.  There was some connection to the song we'd just sung, but I can't remember what it was, or what song it was.  Just that it was too funny, the way it was so exceedingly extraneous.  It cracked me up.  It hadn't taken all that long, after all, and it was very quirkily like that woman.  This set the tone for me for enjoying the quirks of the quirkily not-quite-on-board for the rest of the evening.

That's the space I want to be in.  Appreciating the weird oddballs we are, in our ways, like some family members there's enough good will with (and not too much hurt) to feel fondness at their foibles, quirks, goofiness, or gaps in skill, understanding, w/e.  When familiarity can engender fondness, that's good stuff.  I remind myself that the mission we're all engaged in together, though important to us each in its way, is not, like my new T-shirt says, rocket surgery.  And thank goodness--- not because we'd botch rocket surgery but because the fact that it's not means it's easier to let go.  It doesn't really matter a lick if we don't pull off any of what we're out to pull off.  So yeah I'm irritated at this or that thing I didn't think I'd need to do still, and I feel stress, and I wish I didn't have to take time off work, but, as Carlos said once, it's supposed to be fun.

It's supposed to be fun!

Let's have fun.
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