I just caught myself and went back through an e-mail I was about to send to L., in Kuwait, who somehow hadn't gotten the word earlier about H.'s and my separation. I carefully removed all indications of gender in references to H. or to A., L.'s partner. Not that military e-mail is necessarily seen/read---of course as a routine practice that'd be ridiculous---but you never know what might be referred to later.
In other news, I'm tiring of tuna casserole. (There's still at least one serving to go.)