'Ff'lo (fflo) wrote,

saturday night, alive


Worked on the deck. Still not all clean & prepped. Runnin' out of unfreezing days. Wore earplugs while powerwashing. Made me feel all surreal and blocked from the world, in deep muddied echoes so much of the day. Water all over. Me and muddied deep-echoing thoughts.

If I had started earlier
I'd sand down all the rough;
I'd scrub out all the ground-in dirt
And bleach the moldy stuff.
I'd fill the cracks and patch the holes
And do it all with love,
But, as it is, it's getting late,
And this is good enough.

This is good enough, my friends,
This is good enough
Cuz as it is, it's getting late,
And this is good enough.

(Yeah, it's about growing up.) (Maybe I'll throw it at peteralway next time he throws up an Iron Composer challenge.)

Had kind of a rough week. Doesn't help that I keep forgetting to drink water, perhaps. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank my parents for being major smokers, not so much because of that near SIDS death, but more cuz of the butt one of them left on the back step one day when I was 5 or 6. The drag I attempted thereon---along with, like, that whole constricting chest problem all those years in the car or house with them--- it all added up to mean I'm not smoking now. Hearing how you can shoot pool better with a cigarette in your mouth, and listening to "Black Coffee," and watching that one Jim Jarmusch, and just feeling pretty "f*ck it" lately, it takes a strong tie to that early parental guidance to keep me from picking up a pack and seeing what the hell that part of a death wish gives you to keep company with.

The good news is that now it's gonna be okay if Woody Allen stops making movies. Wes Anderson doesn't churn 'em out quite as often as Woody, but I think I'm now going to be going to his films with a sense of possibility not unlike that I walk in to Woody's with. The Darjeeling Limited: give it all the stars.

It might be something you could call happy, this thing when a movie treats me just right. Or if it couldn't, it's good enough.

Plus Anjelica Huston.

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