It's been a long day. As it ended, I had to do some re-centering, and digesting a whole buncha onion rings outta the freezer, and fighting off the irrational notion that I jinx myself by feeling my oats. I don't believe that, really, with all of me, no matter how true it feels. That kind of feeling is mistaken.
Haven't jumped on for any campaign duty yet, and I will in a minute, but I remembered I wanted to post this BTT post I left in the drafts.
Today's tie is one of the several I got super-cheap at ties.com at the end of the year. Like, 2 bucks each.
I had it on loosely, but it didn't last the day that way. Here's a self-portrait, also including the tie, that I'm calling ( Collapse )
This afternoon on the way back to work I went for a self-treat decaf latte, and I decided to stop in the Warby Parker store nearby, just to see what they had. The gender-bendy Madeleine gave me a quick lay of the land, and I tried on a few pair. In a wildly uncharacteristic move, I just went ahead and bought a pair of frames I like. Within, like, less than 10 minutes. :) This shall be my cue to go to the eye doc's.
In the back of the store they have pencils with things written on them for sale as a fundraiser for a local literacy/writing-tutory group. Reading them, while Madeleine retrieved my frames (and put them in a nice cloth bag), I laughed out loud heartily and hardily, and several times. I bought a pair of MAKESHIFT DRUMSTICKs (cuz you gotta have 2), and didn't realize until back here that (on top of "makeshift" being a word I love) those are both compound words. So it's like 2 double-chocolate donuts, or 4 chocolates, look do you want these or what.
My favorite pencil, though, was the sexy flirt line one: WHAT VARIED SYNTAX YOU HAVE. Omg, amirite? Totes. I bought the last 2 they had of that one.
I wanted---and still want---to send the 2nd one to the 1st one it made me think of. But I shouldn't. So I won't. Right? A.: Probably.
One of the many realizations/comprehensions/noticings I experienced while (finally stopping dragging my feet and facing up to) prepping my open talk was ( Collapse )
Probably gotta get on some campaign stuff now to keep up with my goal for the week.
I also want to write back to Emiene, with whom I had a nice unexpected flurry of texting today. I was telling her how I admire her way of knowing where/when to draw the line with somebody (like she just reported doing in a situation when she was catching whiffs of emotional manipulation). She seems so matter-of-fact about it, the walking away, in a way I so am not. She wrote back that I've always seemed clear on what I want (gotta think about that). Then she added: "Your trouble was that big ol heart."
I heard that. And, tho it's maybe not a great thing for me, it felt nice. If a little hopeless-case. I mean, you could be remembered for worse things. I've also liked being called, by one who knows me well, "sweet-natured". And I do hope that's true, at least sometimes. Can I be a strong, kick-ass centered powerful confident force to reckon, while stalwartly taking care of myself, who is also sweet-natured and grappling with a big ol' heart? A.: I dunno, but it sounds like something to aim for. Focus on the stalwart kick-ass, though. For now. For a while, at least.